You cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building nests in your hair. – Chinese Proverb
Before the Lemurians moved onto the property now known as Gateway, it was a dude ranch called Rancho Risa, or Ranch of Laughter. Generations of Lemurians have built on that legacy. Living and working together makes friends of us, and best friends bring laughter and tears too, sometimes, because of the strong emotional bonds between us.
Sometimes our friends bring laughter without meaning to. I have to tell this story because every time I think of it, it makes me laugh. It might not seem to describe the lofty individuals some may expect to find at the home of the Lemurian Order. But it’s real and the humor we find here has such a kindliness and human touch that it helps us keep on keeping on sometimes when we may get to taking ourselves too seriously.
Everyone likes to be helpful and to feel needed. Sometimes we act on this instinctively rather than asking ourselves, “Can I really be of help?” One day I was in town and needed to know whether a repairman had arrived at Gateway. I called the staff member I thought could answer my question and he very helpfully did. “Yes, he’s there right now,” he assured me.
I hung up and started to my next stop when my friend called back. He said, “You know, actually I’m not at Gateway right now, so I don’t know for sure if the repairman arrived.” I burst out laughing. Can you fault a guy for so earnestly wanting to help?
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As Lemurian students we learn many helpful truths about death, or transition as we think of it. All we are taught helps us see this as a positive part of our ongoing and not only a time of grief and sadness. This is very reassuring. But as human beings we still deeply miss someone we love when they die, especially if their passing is not how we expected it. This is about the first feelings of profound sadness over the loss of a very close friend.
He and I worked together for over 40 years with many ups and downs as we are both strong-minded and outspoken. But we also built much respect for each other as we talked, listened, disagreed, worked and reworked many things together. His death left such a hole in my heart. I didn’t know how I could work like that with anyone else. But best friends bring laughter and tears, even after they have moved on.
One day as I sat crying, I heard the donkey next door start braying. I burst out laughing. Why? My friend could do perfect animal imitations. He could mimic the goats that scream like people, and I’d laugh every time. Hearing the donkey brought my friend’s goat imitations clearly to mind. I laughed hard and could only think, “Thanks! That’s so much fun to remember!” When I feel really sad I think about those screaming goat imitations and you’d have to be a brick wall not to laugh at that!
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