Balance. Purpose. Enlightenment.

Surviving My Worst Embarrassment

I was horrified! Two dozen people watched as I was publicly ridiculed for an awful mistake in the middle of a courtroom trial. It was my worst embarrassment.

As a young, recently hired lawyer in a high-powered law firm, I had been tapped by my boss to be his “second” in this complicated case, a wonderful chance to prove myself to this respected attorney.

All went well until suddenly, it came to light that I had overlooked what was needed to admit a key document into evidence. My boss’s arguments nearly won over the court, but the opposing party’s objection prevailed. I paled, knowing the case might be lost. Our client would be rightfully angry. Months of preparation and thousands of dollars would spiral down the drain. My boss turned to me, loudly demanding, “How could you have done that?” and worse.

My promising career at this new firm seemed over with the likelihood I would be fired. The judge glared at me. I could feel the pitying eyes of attorneys and spectators boring into my back. If only the floor would open up and swallow me, I could escape this horrible failure! But there seemed no way of surviving my worst embarrassment.

When the court day ended, my boss could barely bring himself to speak to me. The other attorneys who had watched this drama unfold offered words of sympathy but these meant little. I was completely wrapped up in my worst embarrassment and the fear of what lay ahead.

What sustains us at such low points in our lives? What keeps us from putting our tail between our legs and slinking away or drowning our misery in alcohol or drugs? We reach deep into ourselves for every strong character trait we have to survive, but times like these call for more than we have and are today. They’re growing times. I needed help and I turned to my spiritual moorings.

The Lemurian Philosophy helps us find good even in failure.

With positive affirmations, I tried mightily to overcome my fear and change my negative thinking. As bleak as things looked, I knew that controlling my feelings would be a step toward changing my environment for the better, hollow as this seemed then.

I faced the next morning with dread, but determination. The trial had to go on. My boss’s anger had softened, and he encouraged me to find a solution to the problem. Still a prey to self-pity, I could barely appreciate his effort, but with his continuing encouragement, we worked together to overcome my mistake and discovered another way to introduce the key evidence. The tide of the case slowly turned in our favor. In the end, the other side settled rather than risk a negative jury verdict.

After the case ended, we talked over what happened and how the mistake came about. To my joyous surprise, my boss asked me to assist him on other trials. From that point forward, I emphasized the Lemurian virtue precision, making sure to dot every “i“ and cross every “t.” I knew there would be other mistakes, but that I could learn a lot from them. And this was the start of a long and successful career at this firm.

Copyright © 2016 Lemurian Fellowship

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